Life is Not a Movie

Dear Mtv,

I know at one point in time I enjoyed you but it’s been so long I can’t remember when that time was. I’m assuming it was back when, you know, you were about music. That’s besides the point, we all know you are a joke with your crappy “dating” shows, the real world which is anything but real anymore and of course your reality shows that take big steps in dumbing down our society. Thank you for that btw.

I can look past all that because, we all know that is you and most of us just ignore your attempts at programming. I can’t, however, look past your choice to make an Americanized version of the British show Skins. I must ask, are you smoking crack?

First of all, this is a tenacious show with actual plotlines, which is something you really don’t know anything about. This is about real kids who swear, have sex and do lots of other naughty things…things I know you don’t have the balls to do. I already read you will not include nudity or four letter words. I can honestly say I don’t know how this show can work without the word fuck in it but maybe that’s just me.

Second, one of the reasons I think the show works so well is because it’s British. I don’t know if it’s the accents or the location or all of the above but the idea of unruly American teenagers just makes me yawn.

I can remember when America tried to do their own version of Coupling. I’d say it was laughable but it wasn’t even that, it was uncomfortable, which isn’t funny in my book. What are we going to do next? Re-make Faulty Towers or Black Books?

If you had any sense Mtv, you’d stop this charade and go back to what you do best, crap reality tv. But we all know you have no sense so, I’ll just amuse myself watching this either faith or just be another step in making America look pathetic.

Sincerely,

Four Letter Word

ps. This is advertising they are already using for the show and I just kind of think they are trying too hard.

What does being a diva mean these days? Everyone seems to be using the term, sort of like how the term bitch became popular many years back. No sorry girl, you are not a bitch, you are a moron actually.

So what does diva really mean? Initially it meant you were a distinguished female singer. What I take is it now also means you are special and you want to be spoiled. You feel you somehow deserve more than the average person, as Wikipedia states, it is also related to being a “prima donna”. It also seems to me, correct me if I’m wrong, it seems a diva is a lot of fucking work.

I am not a diva, I’ve never been a diva. I’ve been spoiled here and there in my life but I’ve never expected anything or demanded anything. I’ve never bought a Coach bag and I’ve never even been in a store that sells the kinds of shoes that Carrie Bradshaw famously wears.

I think someone like me needs my own term but maybe not having to have a name is kind of the point.

First you need to know, I don’t know how the fuck to review Shutter Island, I really don’t but I feel compelled to put it out there anyway. I’m just not sure this will be of any use to any of you, so do with it what you want. Keep in mind, I read this book like 2 years ago, which means I knew what was going to happen even if some of the plot was a little foggy from all that time ago.

The Basics: Two US marshalls go to a mental institution on an island in the 1950s because a female patient has escaped. Teddy (DiCaprio) starts questioning the institution and that maybe something more is going on than people are saying. This is very, as many have said before me not my words, Hitchcockian.

The Good: I loved the Hitchcockness (I love making up words) of the movie, very dark, very eerie and lots of tension building. Leonardo was amazing, if you ask me, and I don’t think his Bostonian accent was as bad as some think it was. I was just glad he didn’t overdo it like Matt Damon always does. The cinematography was beautiful and really portrayed the chill of the scenes.

The Bad: It’s hard to say, because I couldn’t help but compare it to the book the entire time, which it did stay as close to as I can tell. I kept thinking though that this might seem, to someone who didn’t know the story, really far out there. One thing I have to mention is the music, it seemed to me the tension-building music kept coming at the wrong moments it made you kind of want to laugh, which isn’t always good for this kind of movie.

Rating:

• I’m assuming that it’s amusing to Brits and such when us dumb Americans attempt to talk in British slang. Odd that I have never once heard any of them try to mimic us, I wonder why…
• I want to say wow and lovely a lot. Wow.
• The great part of shitty situations is it reminds you how awesome your friends are when you need them.
• Also, I love the filter option on gmail to avoid dealing with unnecessary crap.
• I’m in a transitioning phase in my life right now so I’m trying to not take anything online too seriously, real life needs my attention much more.
• I find, that when you find something, anything, that can make you feel better during a bad time, even for a little bit you should enjoy it as much as you can. Unless it’s drugs, drugs are bad kids.
• I’m more glad today is Friday than I usually am, mostly because I have had a ton of insomnia this week. I think it’s because of medication I’m on because it’s never been this bad my entire life.

Off Topic this Sunday @5pm will be about Europe…I wonder why…

After getting into the show Skins I started reading up about it and I found that, not surprising, a lot of people think it’s a bad influence on teenagers. So…people honestly think that a show is going to influence teens to do drugs and have sex? Because, they weren’t already doing that anyway?

We can’t shield kids from every little thing, have you seen this world? It’s not kind and shit is gonna happen one way or another. I mean, I get that some parents think their children are too young to watch something like this, which makes sense to me but I hate that people think shows like these should not be on tv at all. This is exactly what makes me so sad about this country.

In England, from what it seems to me, they don’t worry about censoring or cleaning things up so people don’t have a hissy fit. If you don’t like something then, you know, don’t watch it. Who really wants to live in a PG-13 world? I know I don’t.

I think if this show had come out when I was a teen I would have been so glad to have something I could finally relate to because let’s face it, there was nothing to relate to with Beverly Hills 90210 other than poor fashion choices. I could have seen that maybe I wasn’t the only 16 year old that questioned everything around me and was depressed. I don’t think tv shows coerce teens to do drugs and get in trouble, I think the world they live in does that.

What are your thoughts?