A Day of Bullets

4. Bullet your whole day.

I’m going to attempt to bullet my Saturday, which was a day I shot a wedding.

  • Wakeup with massive allergies, curse the world.
  • Watch some crappy tv, possibly old Beverly Hills 90210 episodes while Manly Man complains that we watch that every Saturday morning.
  • Throw on clothes and grab my shit then head out to meet Chav for coffee at a new coffee place.
  • Order an iced latte and pray it’s 1/2 decent.
  • Cry of joy that’s it’s one of the best iced lattes you’ve had in a long time.
  • Chav shows up and orders a latte and a fruit cup, feel guilty you got an egg and cheese on focacia bread.
  • Eat sandwich anyway.
  • Head home to prepare for wedding.
  • Dress up like a professional, make sure boobs are hidden away and head out with my trusty GPS.
  • Stop at Finagle a Bagle because I forgot to each lunch.
  • Meet Jenni my 2nd shooter and prepare for a long day.
  • Groom shows up, take pictures with him waiting for bride.
  • Take a LOT of pictures of the groom because bride shows up late.
  • Check my settings.
  • Ceremony starts a 1/2 hour late, goes smoothly.
  • Hurry the bridal party to get pictures done so they can go drink, no drinks for me =(
  • Check my settings again.
  • Sit down but quickly regret it because that’s when I realize how much my feet and back hurt.
  • Reception starts, there are like 7 toasts, really? Each toast is longer than the last one and some are in another language.
  • Disc full, switch to a new disc very quickly.
  • Really sick of fighting other guests with cameras to get the right shots. Cameras should be banned from everything other than the dance floor.
  • Wait, are my settings right?
  • It’s a really small room and I have to keep getting up on a chair to get shots of the dance floor.
  • Ask what time it is — it’s 10:00??? How did that happen? Rush the bride to throw her bouquet so we can crawl out of there.
  • Drive home wishing a coffee place was open so I could get a cold caffienated rush.
  • Crawl into bed after midnight, did I just run a marathon?

1 Comment

  1. Avitable

    May 26, 2011 at 12:51 pm

    I don’t see “masturbate” in there, and we all know you rubbed at least one out during the day.

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