It is What it is

While I realize that I have high standards and I think that is ok I also realize that I also have unrealistic expectations and they aren’t hurting anyone other than myself. I need to stop putting everything that happens to me in a catagory of good and bad and stop defining the world around me.

Sometimes when I feel I need more zen I take a stroll over to Zen Habits and today I found this post. Wow, this really opened my eyes.

When you stop judging things as good or bad, you are no longer burdened by the emotions of this judgment, and can live lighter, freer.

I had a moment the other night where something didn’t go as I had hoped, in fact it was basically a big fat FAIL. I got really upset. Really upset. It was something so small, so not worth letting it ruin an entire evening for me. I had expections and I was left disappointed and angry.

So many times in my life I’ve had expections and because of these I end up missing out on a great moment. I didn’t enjoy my senior prom because I had my expectations so high that it was pretty much impossible to reach them. On the day of my wedding I spent 10 minutes crying because the only expectation I had was to have my wedding outside and last minute they wouldn’t let us. I’m still sad about that.

I’ve decided, basically while writing this, that I’m going to start focusing on everything around me as not good or bad but just being what it is. I’m going to take a moment, when I get upset or disappointed, and realize it is what it is.

It’s as simple as that.

6 Comments

  1. Pauline

    August 10, 2010 at 10:59 am

    “When you stop judging things as good or bad, you are no longer burdened by the emotions of this judgment, and can live lighter, freer.”

    That is great advice! I’d like to take it on my wall! 🙂

    1. Robin

      August 11, 2010 at 1:12 pm

      @Pauline, I probably should do the same. I think I’ll do that right now.

  2. Maureen

    August 10, 2010 at 3:39 pm

    I’ve got to start learning more about zen buddhism. I think it would do wonders for my son.

    I hope it helps you, too

    1. Robin

      August 11, 2010 at 1:13 pm

      @Maureen, I hope it helps too, often I think this personality trait or whatever starts very young, it did for me.

  3. Janelle

    August 11, 2010 at 12:55 am

    I really liked this post. I need to re-read it again and again and again to absorb it fully. Great post!

    1. Robin

      August 11, 2010 at 1:15 pm

      @Janelle, awww I’m glad you liked it, it felt good writing it.

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