Splashdance

I wrote most of this while in Maine.

It’s Friday night right now. No wireless connection, which isn’t surprising since there is almost no cell phone connection. I am taking a moment to decompress to write a little because I’m SORE as fucking HELL. My arm kills because I pulled a muscle or something, I’m exhausted, I have a sunburn and my ass feels like I was gang raped.

They don’t tell you that, being on a raft for the entire day your ass will hurt so bad you can barely sit. When you spent the entire day getting thrown around a raft you want to sit but it hurts. I feel old, I feel like I should go get a place in a nursing home right now. Actually a jacuzzi would probably be enough.

But it wouldn’t be me if I didn’t complain, it’s my M.O. you know. I have to get the bitching out of the way first before I tell you the good stuff.

I was scared to Jebus the whole couple hours before we got started, I kept wondering how the fuck I could get out of this entire thing. Would I have to walk miles back myself? Would I have to blow a trucker to get a lift home? Then I just told myself you aren’t an old lady yet so stop acting like it.

Was it scary? Hell yes, it was scary like a roller coaster is scary except you can actually fall out, hit your head on a rock or drown. Oh and you have to do all the work, the more control you have the less terrifying it is.

There are moments where you get to a spot that dips down in the water into this like big hole and you just hold on for dear life hoping the whole thing doesn’t flip over. If the damn thing flips over you have to hold onto your paddle while you try to catch back up to the raft.

There was a part by the small waterfall where you can “surf the wave” basically and I came up with a term for when all the water flies into your face and fills up the raft. I call it “the splash dance” because it’s a lot like that scene in Flashdance where she gets splashed with water but 100x worse.

But the big news I must share: I did NOT fall out of the raft and I did NOT lose my paddle :win: I fucking RULE!

 

 

(You can see the rest of the pictures on my Facebook)

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