Horses and Bourbon and…um…

Well…I can’t think of anything else.

I was trying to think of three things that Kentucky, my new home state is known for. Horses are huge here, to the point where horse news often makes the front page of the local newspaper. Above the fold. And you can’t swing a dead cat without hitting a bourbon distillery around these parts.

Oh, and if you happen to have a dead cat, they probably have a bourbon that would go perfect with it.

Anyhoo, I’m the former Mr. Fabulous. You can call me Brad. Robin asked me to do a guest post while she and Hunky Eric are exploring the Emerald Isle, frolicking with Darby O’Gill and the little people and wondering if they’ll get a chance to see Colin Farrell with his shirt off.

I figured I’d catch you up on what keeps me busy over here in The Commonwealth of Kentucky and my Shiny New Life:

Work. I’m back working in non-profit, for an organization that helps get low income folks into affordable housing. It’s more of a commute than I would like, but it’s a great company that does really good work. Also, it’s the Monday through Friday 8-5 schedule that I wanted, so that my weekends can be free for…

Karaoke. We are huge karaoke dorks. We’ve been to several venues around town, and have settled in as regulars at Southland on Friday nights. Good choices for me: Blues Brothers, Prince, Elvis, Billy Joel, Rodney Crowell. Poor choices: The Eagles, Creedence Clearwater Revival, Alabama 3. Recently I’ve taken a few chances and done Baby One More Time and I Touch Myself, both times devoting the songs to guys in the audience. So obviously, I have issues. And after Friday comes Saturday and…

UK Football. We have season tickets, which means that we have a lot of opportunities to rub elbows with inbred mouthbreathers, pay exorbitant prices for beverages, evacuate our bladders in third world restrooms, and high five complete strangers who you just know did not wash their hands when they walked out of those very same restrooms. And in our spare time we…

Work on the house. We’re still trying to figure out what do to with some of the rooms. We finally uncovered the pool table, which is mostly ironic, as neither of us can shoot stick worth a damn. We’re setting up a karaoke stage down in the basement as well, because that’s what dorky white people do. Anyone know where I can buy a disco ball? Also, if someone would like to come over and rake all these fucking leaves for me, that would be great. That would leave me more time to master the…

Wii. We recently finally jumped on the Wii bandwagon. I haven’t been gaming in several years. Adam suggested the Wii because he reasoned it was the easiest system to learn and play, given our “advanced age”. Fucker. In a few weeks We’ll be down in Florida for his annual Halloween party, and I look forward to punching him in his spleen. Once I learn where the spleen is. By the way, my costume is going to be kickass.

Well, that’s enough about me. After all, I’m not really a blogger anymore. It’s been nice chatting with y’all. If you’re ever in Lexington, Kentucky, look us up. We’ll show you a good time. We’ll get you drunk on bourbon and make you ride a horse.

Or something.


  • http://pixiestemple.blogspot.com *pixie*

    Oh Brad—you’ll always be Fab to me. ;)

  • http://www.avitable.com Avitable

    I just didn’t want either of you getting confused with all of the newfangled buttons and other doohickeys. :avi:

  • http://specialkforkim.blogspot.com Special K

    *giggling*
    I trust you’ve had a Hot Brown as well……yummmmmm :robin:

  • http://pointless-drivel.com Mr. Fabulous

    Avitable–Yes, but it requires a lot of physical movement. I need to take extra geritol to stay sharp.

    Special K–Hot Brown…is that the latino hooker down on Chestnut Street?

  • http://amandainreallife.blogspot.com Amanda

    You’re only like five hours away from me now, I’d drive that far for bourbon.

  • http://poppycede.com Poppy

    We have to wait for a guest post in order to find out how you’re doing?!

    :fu:

  • http://andastheworldturns.blogspot.com Turnbaby

    Wait you forgot the favorite football game accessory on a 90 degree day—a six month old baby!

  • http://pointless-drivel.com Mr. Fabulous

    Amanda–Well get in your car, girl!

    Poppy–No…I have a cell phone, too, Dorkster :)

    Turnbaby–If I was a blogger, I’d write a post about that!

  • http://dreaminginthedark.org B

    I’m sure you can find a disco ball online!

  • http://sybillaw-sybilcrankypants.blogspot.com/ Sybil Law

    Oooh – when Amanda comes down, or up, or whatever, I will drive down, because you guys are like, 2 hours from me!
    Partay!

  • Ro

    I was going to leave a snarky comment…like “really, it takes a trip to Ireland to hear from you?!”
    Then quickly realised that you don’t know me from Adam (or Eve for that matter) since I’m mostly a reader (and occasional commenter) of this here blog.

    1. Yeay for Karaoke. In NYC there are plenty of venues for this, but too many Broadway-star wannabees.
    2. I will welcome anyone into my fold of soccer madness (hey, I’m Italian, I *have* to be a soccer fan)…even if it’s rooting for the ::cough:: brits.
    3. Weeeeee…I’m in awe and admiration for anyone who owns one. I’m waiting to move to a larger apartment so that I can actually play all dem games. If Kentucky weren’t that far, I’d invite myself over. I’d bring a disco ball, of course.

    :rock:

  • http://www.sweet-catastrophe.com Jade

    I’m pretty sure they sell disco balls at Spencer’s. You have a Spencer’s in Fayette Mall…or at least that’s what the store locator says.

  • http://whall.org/blog whall

    What’s funny is that I know your dirty little secret. Robin’s NOT gone to Ireland; she’s NOT getting “guest posters” for 10 days; she’s NOT even married. She’s making up the guest posts as she goes along and getting a ton of attention for it.

    She even resurrected one of the most profane and attention-getting bloggers out there and barely pulled it off.

    If I didn’t know her better, she’d probably try to play off a post as if I wrote it.

  • http://oneblondesambition.blogspot.com Melissa

    The spleen is in the upper left quadrant of the abdomen. Punching him there might actually compromise mortality because it’s composed of highly vascular reticular fibers that don’t lend easily to traditional sutures.

    In human terms, your friend could bleed to death internally if you punch him there. Go for the toes instead.

  • http://pandoraschest.blogspot.com PandoraWilde

    You could move the pool table over to one end of the room and build a stage to fit over it. I actually saw this done once in a very small bar that was hosting a drag show.

  • http://pointless-drivel.com Mr. Fabulous

    B–You’re right, you can get anything online!

    Sybil–If you are so close, why aren’t we already hanging out?

    Ro–You can still invite yourself over. We’ll make room for you.

    Jade–You want me to go to a MALL?

    Whall–”Resurrected”? Does that mean that I’m a zombie? That could hurt me…

    Melissa–How about the clavicle? Can I go for the clavicle?

    Pandora–I can’t hammer a nail straight, and you want me to build a stage?

  • http://www.roadlessunraveled.com Robin

    You can post here whenever you get the itch, but then I suggest you get a cream for that because it won’t go away and will only get worse.

    Someday I’m going to hitch to Kentucky, I just hope the twins can get me that far. I’ll gladly sing karaoke with you but I insist on a duet and about 7 cosmos before that, they have cosmos there.

    ps. Love you :kiss: