Mother Sympathy

Again I’m going to reference KISS 108 but I was listening to their Right Now segment when people call in with what is going on in their lives right now. The other day a girl called in about an incident she witnessed the night before.

The girl said she was at a party I think when she and her friend witnessed a hit and run where the driver crushed a car parked on the side of the road. The drive drove right off and they were not able to get a license plate number.

The car went around the corner, came back and tried to see the damage that they did. They tried to stop the driver but of course they only drove right off. They filed a police report.

The next day I think they were driving down the street when they saw the car, which was in the same neighborhood. While escorted by the police they confronted the woman who claimed she thought she was the one who’d been hit. They reminded her that there was no way she could be hit by a parked car.

The cop apparently felt bad for the woman, since she was a mother and she wasn’t arrested.

I love how women are excused for so many things because they are a mother but how often are men excused from things because they are a father? In fact, often mothers get off easy while father’s are crucified. I know this is certainly not always the truth but more often than not this is what I’ve witnessed.

Now, is it the having child and being female or is it the act of giving birth that lends sympathy?

If you want to listen to the audio here you can, this part of it is at the 5:40 mark so you can fastforward. I tried to edit the damn thing with audacity with no luck and the file was too big to upload.

Right Now Tuesday July 22

  1. B

    July 23, 2008 at 9:19 am

    A crime is a crime. I don’t care if you’re man, woman, black, white or an alien from mars, if you committ a crime you should be arrested and what not. What if this woman had hurt someone? What if she hit a child?

    Could it be traumatizing for a child to see a parent arrested? Of course but the parent should’ve thought about that BEFORE they committed a crime.

    and you’re 100% right, if it was a father who had done this, his ass would be in jail.

  2. Jen

    July 23, 2008 at 9:30 am

    Being a mother, I can’t say that I’ve been treated any differently than if I didn’t have a child. Of course, I’ve never hit a parked car….

    The only time I can say I got “special treatment” is when I begged the ladies in the washroom line up to let SweetiePie go first to avoid an accident.

    I guess I haven’t heard that many news stories where a mother was let off of something solely because she was a mother. This cop in your story is an idiot and should be sitting behind a desk if he can’t handle a few tears from a woman!

  3. Robin

    July 23, 2008 at 10:19 am

    B – Exactly, no matter who the person is if you do something like that you should suffer the same as any other person for your crime.

    Jen – I know you being a mother you are from one end of it but I can tell you from the end of watching fathers never getting the same treatment as mothers I know it’s something very common. Maybe it has to do often with the state or circumstances but I’ve seen it a lot. If I had to pick one thing to fight for my entire life it would be “fathers rights.”

  4. Maureen

    July 23, 2008 at 10:35 am

    I believe that it stems in a large part from the idea that children need their mother (preferably their biological mother) in order to survive & thrive. Doesn’t matter how that mother behaves in the world or with her children, they would be lost without her.

    And, that a father, on the other hand, is disposable & replaceable for a child – kind of like a fashion accessory – nice to have, but not necessary and, sometimes, even a hindrance to a child’s well-being.

    I believe that you know how I feel about that particular societal stereotype :tongue:

  5. Avitable

    July 23, 2008 at 1:48 pm

    Isn’t hit and run legal if you get a certain number of points?

  6. Robin

    July 23, 2008 at 1:52 pm

    Maureen – I know just how you feel about this, it’s a subject people don’t talk about enough.

    Avi – I think you are thinking of Grand Theft Auto.

  7. Avitable

    July 23, 2008 at 1:55 pm

    You mean real life is different? Damn. :avi:

  8. The Absurdist

    July 23, 2008 at 7:49 pm

    I want to be able to rent children for these specific types of things.

    Totally unfair for those of us who chose not to breed and blow the population curve. Totally unfair.

  9. Heather B

    July 23, 2008 at 9:17 pm

    WOW I have never heard of anything like that, that is crazy. A crime is a crime regardless of who you are..

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