No Resolutions For Me
I figure my resolutions are always the same so why bother? In fact, after reading an old journal of mine I know my resolutions haven’t changed since I was in middle school in 1991 :rolleyes:
So I thought I’d help out and hand out some resolutions:
Mr. Fabulous – You need to embrace new/younger music, some of it is pretty good if you give it a chance. Oh and from now on when looking in my window at night try cleaning them once and a while.
Kentucky Girl – Start making me cookies on a regular basis, I’ll appreciate them the most. Let’s start with non-raisin saturated oatmeal cookies and go from there.
Heather B – I’d say let’s try not to have the server down this year but it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen. Instead just be at my beck-and-call 24/7, sound good?
Gwen – This year I think you should fully embrace your dark side because quite honestly it gets a little lonely over here with Fab and Avi molesting each other all day.
Dutch Bitch – I want to give you an offer you can’t refuse, Erik on a lease. Now, he’s getting up there as he’s almost 40 but he’s still in pretty good condition. I can probably give you a good deal since it’s the new year and I’ll throw in a neurotic cat.
Avitable – This year I think it’s time for you to give other livestock a chance because there is more out there than sheep you know. You might try a goat or if you are really adventurous…a cow. Moo.
Frankie – Your new career should be my wedding assistant since you were the one to find me the best cupcake lady. All you have to do is just run and do whatever I email or text you. Now hop to it!
Mistress M – You must stop downplaying your sexuality because you are sexy. I want you to say it out loud right now “I am sexy.” You have every right to be open about your naughty side…stop hiding it :robin:
Janet – I might suggest you dig a little deeper with your TITMT like listing the different objects people use in masturbation. I mean, I’m just saying :dunno:
Tracy – My one recommendation is to try to be less Canadian, can you do that? I think that would be great.
The Mutt Princess – See I’m pretty sure you are a serial killer when you aren’t blogging and I think it’s time for you to just admit to it. I mean, it only makes sense.
Leanne – I’m thinking you need a hobby because you just don’t have enough to keep you busy. I mean, you know, read a book or take a walk or something. Sitting around the house all day just watching the world go by is no way to live your life.
Angel – I think it is best she move her entire family to Massachusetts in order to be my cleaning lady and organize every inch of my house.Â Hell, she might as well organize my sheds and Erik’s shop too.Â I can pay her in boob shots.