All Shapes and Sizes

After this post today I again got thinking about bullies as it’s been something I’ve come in contact with one too many times in my life. I’ve come across all different kinds bullying and rarely is the bully willing to pull their head out of their ass long enough to even recognize what they are really doing. It’s always all about them.

I’ve seen a friend walk on eggshells around a boyfriend afraid of what might set him off but still confused about leaving him.

I’ve witnessed a grown woman/mother be afraid to do anything because she thinks her husband will demean her for her choice and feel she can never do anything right. I’ve seen her run away and hide once because she hid something from him out of fear of his reaction.

I’ve seen a friend fall to pieces when she found out her aunt died by the hands of her boyfriend during an abusive rage.

I’ve seen a man be afraid to speak up or defend himself because for years his wife beat him down so far he didn’t know how to and be too afraid to fight for his own rights assuming she would always win. I’ve seen that same man takes years to find himself again and his strength but in the process lose everything else having to work to get it all back again.

I myself have been taunted, harrassed, beaten down emotionally to the point where I’ve often felt it was my own fault.

I know often we find this kind of information out second or third handed, it’s hard to really know what is going on unless you were there when it happened. If you can honestly tell me you weren’t belittled, threatened or physically harmed at all I will apologize for assuming otherwise. If you can honestly tell me you weren’t afraid for your safety then I am sorry but only then.

I know how quickly things can be taken out of context, it’s happened to me before. At the same time, I know how someone whose been abused also makes excuses.

  1. Mr. Fabulous

    November 21, 2007 at 11:34 am

    I know how important this issue is to you, as we have spoken about it before, and as before, I agree 100% with what you say.

  2. Amy

    November 21, 2007 at 1:40 pm

    This is such a classy, eloquent post. I mentioned to Adam that I wished we could just do some sort of a massive reposting of his exact post – simply because I feel like even with all the media coverage somehow the message just isn’t getting across.

    Then I read your post and realized that maybe an exact reposting isn’t necessary.

  3. Robin

    November 21, 2007 at 1:43 pm

    Mr. Fab – Thanks.

    BPR – :clap:

    Amy – Thanks, that means a lot to me. I’ve seen it all too many times to not say anything for myself.

  4. Tara

    November 21, 2007 at 4:10 pm

    I’m a woman who thought it was all my fault and he had me convinced it was, too. Only now, a year-plus out of the emotionally abusive hell I was in can I see what he took from me, what I allowed to happen (I was so struggling), and what I have to get back for myself. And that’s what I’m doing. One day at a time.

  5. themuttprincess

    November 21, 2007 at 5:12 pm

    You did a wonderful job of expressing what a lot of people are trying to say. Bullies are worthless pieces of shit. I, myself have been on the side that watches while someone they love keeps getting themselves (and their kids) hurt because they are in denial, I have myself, also been the victim of emotional, physical and mental abuse (more than once on all 3 areas). Seriously, none of them are healthy. And truthfully, feeling like a worthless sack of shit is just as bad as being struck. They both leave scars.

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