Why Not Elope?

That’s a very good question and I have a feeling every couple planning a wedding has considered this once or twice.  Here are my pros and cons list to having a wedding:


  1. Getting all your family together for possibly the only time in your whole life.
  2. Celebrating your relationship with everyone you care about.
  3. Having a big party.
  4. Dressing up really pretty and feeling really special for a day.


  1. Putting a lot of money into a 5 hour party.
  2. Having to deal with other people and their opinions.
  3. Stress and forgetting the reason why you are doing it.

I could elope and just drop this whole big hoopla but I think I would regret it :unsure:  I’m excited to have everyone together and have this fun/romantic event.  I just wish someone would make it a little easier on me sometimes…

  1. Mist 1

    March 29, 2007 at 3:23 pm

    I eloped once. I’m not sure if it counts as eloping as I was unconscious in the back seat and he drove me to Tennessee where we didn’t need a blood test.

  2. Avitable

    March 29, 2007 at 3:53 pm

    Don’t forget about gifts. That’s a big con to eloping. No presents.

  3. Friglet

    March 29, 2007 at 4:57 pm

    You know what they say – If your relationship can survive planning a wedding, you’re all set!

  4. Avitable

    March 29, 2007 at 5:16 pm

    We actually said to ourselves that if we could survive law school and planning our wedding, we could survive anything.

  5. Janet

    March 29, 2007 at 5:20 pm

    Can I just cut and paste this post and add it to my blog?:)

    So should I take it that you didn’t book the place we talked about (I haven’t scrolled down to old posts yet)

  6. Robin

    March 29, 2007 at 5:32 pm

    Mist – I’d love to know more :eyebrow:

    Avi – Well, I was trying to not sound like a spoiled brat :unsure:

    Friglet – Hell, if you can survive his 3 year long divorce then you can survive anything…wedding/marriage will be EASY.

    Avi – Note above comment.

    Janet – We were so close…then my dad started getting difficult…we’re waiting now.

  7. Avitable

    March 29, 2007 at 5:35 pm

    No way! Wedding are all about the gifts. You should spend just enough so that people will come and give you enough gifts that will be more than what you paid.

  8. Robin

    March 29, 2007 at 5:36 pm

    But I’m not paying for the wedding 😀

  9. Avitable

    March 29, 2007 at 5:39 pm

    No? Even better! You’ll make out like a bandit!

  10. Robin

    March 29, 2007 at 5:41 pm

    Great! I can finally get that sex change operation :clap:

  11. Avitable

    March 29, 2007 at 5:43 pm

    Sweet! Seems like all the cool kids are getting them these days.

  12. Geeky Dragon Girl

    March 29, 2007 at 7:22 pm

    I’ve always hated weddings. Big ol’ hoopla, wasted money, endless stress, all for one day? Is that even worth it? If that’s the only thing that can bring a family together, then who needs ’em? And who needs 12 different sets of dishes and silver platters? Just elope and save yourself all the trouble, including the returning of useless gifts to the store.

  13. J.

    March 29, 2007 at 8:58 pm

    Girl, you have no idea how much I identify.
    I debated between just going away somewhere and inviting a few close people along … or even going downtown to the JP. At one time, I think I considered Vegas. LOL.
    I ended up striking the right balance between casual and elegant … and loved it all.
    And I still got to wear the dress! Heh.
    There’s a video somewhere on my site but I’m lazy right now. I’ll try to dig it up for you.

    The only piece of advice I can give is do it all for YOU. Nobody else. Please yourself … it’s your day.

  14. Heather B

    March 30, 2007 at 12:28 am

    Both of my marriages we eloped…. not sure i would ever be ready for a big wedding and spend lots of $$$ on it

  15. Kentucky Girl

    March 30, 2007 at 7:08 am

    Skip the wedding, elope and then throw a giant-assed party. You can still wear your dress and get gifts then. 😀 The ceremony part was the most expensive for me and it was over in like 20 minutes or less. The party was where it was at, yo.

  16. Avitable

    March 30, 2007 at 7:19 am

    KG, the ceremony was the most expensive? That was the cheapest part for us.

  17. Kentucky Girl

    March 30, 2007 at 7:25 am

    Yeah, the site fees and the musical people’s fees and all that were our biggest expense. The yacht club we got for free since we’re members. The food and drinks were at cost because we’re members. The cake was from Safeway (under $200) and the DJ was a friend from work who did DJing on the side. The yacht club had all the place settings, silverware, glasses, chairs, tables, tablecloths, candles, etc. already so we didn’t have to rent anything.

  18. Avitable

    March 30, 2007 at 7:29 am

    Even though we’re not religious, we did it in a church. Cost us $200. That’s it. The musician played for free, we didn’t waste money on flowers that nobody would remember, and we had an 8-minute ceremony.

  19. Kentucky Girl

    March 30, 2007 at 7:33 am

    Our church was a lot more. And the preacher guy’s fees. I didn’t have flowers at the front. Fuck that. I wasn’t paying for those. The church did have a “coordinator” that I had to pay a fee to as well. I was like, WTF? That is so stupid. She isn’t doing anything FOR me. All the musicians and everything HAD to be church approved. The wedding part was lame. I totally wouldn’t do the ceremony again if I were to get married.

  20. Robin

    March 30, 2007 at 7:45 am

    If this place works out we will have the ceremony ON-SITE so it doesn’t get any easier about that. It’s not the ceremony that is the problem, it’s planning a big party with my parents.

  21. Avitable

    March 30, 2007 at 7:48 am

    Yeah, that must be hard. Since we paid for our own, my parents were invited, and that was about it.

  22. Robin

    March 30, 2007 at 7:50 am

    We could scratch it all and just do it in our backyard but that would mean a lot of the people from OOT probably wouldn’t be there…I like the idea of having the chance to have all these people come from all over the country.

  23. Avitable

    March 30, 2007 at 8:03 am

    Yeah, it’s nice to see people you haven’t seen in a while, and since it’s your wedding, you only have to talk to them for a few minutes and you can move on. It’s perfect, really.

  24. Robin

    March 30, 2007 at 8:05 am

    Avitable – Are you trying to win the contest? I’m actually looking forward to the rehearsal dinner a lot since all the people IN the wedding are who I’m most excited to see.

  25. Avitable

    March 30, 2007 at 8:08 am

    I didn’t think the contest started until April 1st? I didn’t even realize that I was your second highest commenter!

  26. Robin

    March 30, 2007 at 8:09 am

    Nope, the first winner post will be posted on April 2nd (since rarely people read blogs on Sundays).

  27. Kentucky Girl

    March 30, 2007 at 8:10 am

    There is a contest? Wait. I love contests. Hehe

  28. Avitable

    March 30, 2007 at 8:19 am

    Interesting. I’m not going to be cheap, though.

  29. Robin

    March 30, 2007 at 8:20 am

    I don’t know…I heard you were pretty cheap.

  30. Avitable

    March 30, 2007 at 8:22 am

    Only when it comes to sex.

  31. stephanie

    March 30, 2007 at 10:47 am

    My parents offered me the money they were spending on the wedding as a down payment for a house. I wanted a party! Now I’m divorced, and I’ve got no house.

    Not quite sure where that leaves me. :doh:

  32. Gemini

    March 30, 2007 at 2:57 pm

    I am just going to say there will be no eloping unless Leo and I are invited! :thumbsup: then it would be ok!

  33. Robin

    March 30, 2007 at 3:01 pm

    Avi – I heard you offer discounts too.

    Stephanie – If they offered the money I’d probably elope but then again we already really have everything we need including a house.

    Gemini – Ok ok…ok 😀

  34. Avitable

    March 30, 2007 at 3:03 pm

    Yeah. Only if you have a coupon book, though!


  35. Robin

    March 30, 2007 at 3:04 pm

    Is there double coupon day?

  36. Avitable

    March 30, 2007 at 3:07 pm

    Comes with free reacharound.

  37. Robin

    March 30, 2007 at 3:42 pm

    Anything prohibited?

  38. Mr. Fabulous

    April 1, 2007 at 4:25 pm

    We didn’t actually elope, but we pretty much just invited our parents to it, and we had it at our house with a JP. We have never regretted it.

    Go ahead and have the big one this time. You’ll go the cheaper route with the second and third weddings, trust me 🙂

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