If you’ve ever thought I’ve held back on my blog *cough*Miss Ann*cough* then you’re about to learn a secret of mine I don’t share with many other people. Only a few close friends and family know about this secret or at least the extent of it.
The secret is: I have a security blanket. Now that in itself might not be a huge secret but with the state of what the blanket is in is the real secret. Not only is this blanket on it’s last legs but this is also the second security blanket I have worn all the way down.
My first blanket was given to me by The Grandmother before I was born I think. It was a pure white silky blanket with little flower stitching and it was for my crib. I took hold of that thing like it was a life preserver.
As a kid that blanket went everywhere I went and when I accidentally left it at a rest stop once when I was traveling with my family we had to drive all those miles back just to retrieve it. I guess you could picture me as a Linus because it was permanently attached to me.
I also did this rubbing thing with the blanket between my pointer and middle finger. I would sit and rub the edges of it and also did this thing where I curled my tongue. At age 28 I still do this and even when I don’t have my blanket with me I’m often curling my tongue. Mr. Yoda calls it “sucking your tongue” but I don’t suck, well not my tongue at least.
By my teen years I wore out the old blanket completely. I mean somehow I literally made it dissolve into nothing but one tiny little piece that I think I saved somewhere. Then my mother made me a beautiful quilt out of all my old t-shirts and memories, which she gave me when I went away to college.
Somehow that blanket turned into blanket II and now the poor thing is beyond pathetic. I’ve given the blanket back to my mom several times to repair but eventually it was just too far gone. I know I need to give it up but I don’t know how to. It’s one of the few things in the world that truly relaxes me and that’s hard to let go of.