A Friend

So say you have this friend who’s always had a lot of problems.  Say you have a friend who’s in her mid to late twenties who still lives with her mother and still can’t drive a car.  Say your friend who’s always been sick now tells you that she’s been having seizures and is forgetting things that happen.  She even forgets the last few times she talked to you.

She tells you her hours were cut down at work because she’s has so much trouble functioning.  She also tells you she can’t take a shower alone in case she has a seizure and that her doctors aren’t helping other than giving her medication.

Then she says, while crying, she can’t do this anymore.  She says she’s a burden to everyone and wants to give up.  She’s tired of fighting and is too unhappy to bother anymore.

You tell her she needs to do whatever she can do to make it through this and get the help she needs.  You tell her she’s strong and you know things will eventually get better.  You wish you could do more…

You are also afraid how much you can handle this but afraid to not do anything either.

  1. Miss Ann

    October 22, 2006 at 1:05 pm

    I think that’s the worst part…the part where you just can’t take anymore…where you absolutely don’t want to take on anymore because you have your own stuff to deal with.

    It sucks but it gets to a point where you have to think about your own emotional self preservation.

    For me, I think I would start avoiding that friend…I lose patience with people who have a consistent case of the ‘poor me.’

    I feel for you. Good luck with all that.

  2. jane

    October 22, 2006 at 3:06 pm

    There’s a slight possibility she may be on some medication that is causing the seizures.
    I agree with Miss Ann, first priority for you,
    is you. When someone isn’t doing all they can
    to help themselves & you’ve given them resources,
    my best advice is to tell them it’s over your head &
    to seek professional help.
    At least that way you aren’t leaving her out in the
    cold, but also aren’t taking her burden or letting
    her manipulate you.
    Good luck

  3. Robin

    October 22, 2006 at 3:43 pm

    I definitely have more than enough to deal with in my life and I just get so worried about her. I feel guilty I’ve always had so many more opportunities than her and if I had that many problems I know someone in my life would do whatever it took to get me the help I needed but I know her resources are limited.

    I feel awful but at the same time I know it’s not something I need to take on for myself. As adults we all need to find our way through these kinds of things…I know I’ve had to do that a lot for myself.

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