Coddling

Is it just me or do parents these days overly coddle their children?

If a kid is going to ride their bike they not only seem to be wearing a helmet (which I never wore) but are also wearing knee and elbow pads.

Parents want to change everything so kids don’t get their feelings hurt.  I heard they want to get rid of teachers using red ink because it’s too harsh on the kids.  They want them to use colors like purple or green because red has a stigma.

I don’t know about you but the often harsh world I grew up in made me who I am right now.  I was as sensitive as they come as a kid and reality was what toughened me up enough to survive the world without always breaking into tears.

I realize the world has gotten a lot scarier and a lot more dangerous since I was a child.  Now predators can use the internet to find innocent children and that is a scary concept.

One of the reasons I’m not sure I want to have children is because I’m not sure I want to bring a child into the world we live in right now. Children can only be protected so much before it ends up taking away from what life is supposed to be. If it weren’t for the pain we feel in our lives at times the happy moments wouldn’t be nearly as beautiful.

  1. crystal

    June 2, 2006 at 10:01 am

    The only time I ever wore a helmet on a bike was when I rode in the kiddy-chair attached to the back of my mother’s bike. And honestly, I got hurt more just messing around than I ever did doing any of the things you see kids wearing pads/helmets to do these days. Some of my worst cuts and scrapes were caused by me tripping over my own two feet, not paying attention to what I was supposed to be doing, and my one trip to the ER was brought on by smacking my head into a storage locker door while pretending to be Wonder Woman.

    I think you’re absolutely correct though, we need to bad stuff to make the good stuff actually good. I think that this “protect the children at all costs” mindset society has now is one of the biggest reasons why there’s so many kids (and parents!) with entitlement issues. Parents (and society with its’ “just a kid, doesn’t know any better” attitude) give the kids the idea that they can do no wrong, and the kids grow up thinking they’ll get the world on a silver platter and no one can criticize them for anything.

  2. Robin

    June 2, 2006 at 10:07 am

    Thank you for that Crystal. Well said :thumbsups:

    I also see it as if you try to protect a kid too much they will rebel. I was never overprotected so I never needed to rebel. Ok I went a little crazy in college but I think I had a good enough base to find my way around. Listen to my Theme Song, life is about making mistakes and that’s how we learn things.

    I am who I am today because of everything I went through. The kids that are overly coddled are the ones that never leave home and wear aluminum hats :willynilly:

    p.s. you do sound a bit clumsy.

  3. crystal

    June 2, 2006 at 10:17 am

    Yep, I went a little crazy in college too, I had strict folks who let me be myself, but still set boundries, so when I had no boundries I rebelled a bit, but I still knew how to keep my head on straight and not get too stupid.

    And I’m quite clumsy at times. I blame the tripping on the nasty orthopedic shoes I wore as a kid, but the rest of it was purely me trying to do too much at once :duh:

  4. Robin

    June 2, 2006 at 10:22 am

    Hey, some of the most stupid mistakes I’ve made are now the best stories I have :paperbag:

  5. Donna

    June 2, 2006 at 10:33 am

    I really couldn’t have said it any better than Crystal. I mean sure people need to protect their children…but they should encourage them to work for what they want in life. Teach them that they need to keep striving for the good in life, instead of feeling that everything is owed to them. Not to mention all those cuts, scrapes and bruises brought on by ourselves taught us to be a little more careful the next time. :rock:

  6. Robin

    June 2, 2006 at 4:09 pm

    I think over-protecting your child is the easy way out. It’s a lot harder to be involved and teach them the tools they need to learn.

  7. ambersmonkeys

    June 5, 2006 at 11:22 am

    I understand exactly what you are saying…as a mother of three, I watch other people with their kids and wonder what they are thinking….Being that Diego is just a week and a half old, many people say, don’t take them out, keep them at home, don’t let anyone touch them…blah blah…the day we left the hospital I had to stop and fill a Rx, so off to Target we went….I know some people would say I was crazy….but know what..that was over a week ago and Diego is still fine….then with Kylie..last year we were at a baby shower and they ahd a wood burning stove…I kept telling Kylie to leave it alone and she didn’t want to…she kept going to it…finally I said, ok, you will see….she touched her little finger to it and immediately got burned….yes, she did get a blister, but to this day she WILL NOT touch a wood burning stove….she learned….many times hurting yourself is the only way you learn and if you don’t experience it, you will always wonder what would happen IF you DID do this or touch that….lol….jmo

  8. Robin

    June 5, 2006 at 11:29 am

    Well said Amber, it’s nice to hear a mother say this kind of thing…it’s unusual. Everyone is just so scared.

    Congrats on the birth of Diego! I didn’t know :yipee:

  9. Maureen

    June 5, 2006 at 3:44 pm

    I don’t see any reason why we shouldn’t take advantage of protective gear if it’s available. I don’t think that my kids are going to be any more entitled in life because I tell teach them to take care of themselves as best they can. I don’t really see the correlation there.

    And, sure, life is going to throw them some bad stuff some times. I hope to be there to help them learn how to deal with it. But, I hope they have more joy in their lives than disappointment and mean people. Just because it’s bound to happen sometimes, doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try to keep it at bay as much as possible (for our kids, for other people we love, for ourselves and for everyone, really).

    And, I understand the stove analogy. I still need to get an ‘owie’ before I’ll really learn a life lesson from time to time, too. But, my kids are pretty smart (most are) and so am I, so – if I can teach them a lesson *without* pain (physical or emotional), why not do it?

  10. Robin

    June 5, 2006 at 3:48 pm

    Very true Maureen. It’s not that I don’t think people should protect their children I just don’t think they should go overboard to the point they miss out on life. I think a lot of parents are afraid of the world around us (understandably) and go a little too far.

  11. Krayzee Chickadee

    June 10, 2006 at 11:38 am

    Having kids is a really hard job. Allison is just about into full blown teenagerdom – which is scary all by itself. I’m dealing with her PMS, depression at times, and all the other stuff that goes along with it. Noah is kind of a loner. He wants friends, but he is so particular about who he wants to be with that not many of the boys at school meet his standards. Jennifer is just starting to enter the talk-back phase….and the thing is she is so darned smart. Joshua has a little temper on him that I hope will subside as he enters kinder in the fall.

    I can totally understand your feelings about bringing a child into the world in this day and age. I constantly worry about Allison & boys & being on the internet. She started to do a yahoo chatroom one time when I was over her shoulder, and it was less than a minute before some creepazoid came along to ask questions a 12 year old shouldn’t have to read. Yes, chatrooms are now banned in this house. Too much rambling….. :wave:

  12. Robin

    June 10, 2006 at 11:44 am

    KC – I have so much respect for parents, I don’t know how anyone does it. If there is one thing parents should be careful about it’s the internet…it’s dangerous. You know, when I was 17 I met an older guy from the internet in person and I don’t think my parents knew. I could have gotten myself into some bad trouble but I lucked out. The guy was skeezy, I don’t know what I was thinking…I had a broken heart at the time.

    If Allison ever needs an older (but mature) woman to talk to she can talk to me…I’ve been there done that and definitely know what NOT to do :thumbsup:

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