When you know smoking is bad

I’ve smoked on and off since I was about 20 or so. When I went off to college I was allergic to smoke but going to basement parties that certainly fixed mycigarette smoke allergy. I completely gave up smoking when I got serious with Erik since he hates it so much…I was glad to finally give it up.

Still though when I go out with some of my old smoking buddies I may smoke a few cigarettes. I’ve found the last two times that I have smoked a few cigarettes the next day my arm hurts. It has this almost numb but painful feeling as if I slept on it bad. Think that is a sign I shouldn’t bother with it anymore?

It always seems to be harmless to smoke a few cigarettes every few months but I guess my body is responding very negatively to even a little bit of it. I don’t really get why I have this emotional need to smoke from time to time.

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