Have you ever been bullied?

I can’t remember a part of my childhood or teenage years (between 4 and 16) when I wasn’t bullied or teased to some degree. I know I’m not alone and a big part of my fear of having children is the idea of seeing them go through the same kind of thing.

I don’t know about you but I was bullied more by “friends” than actual general bullies…that was the hardest part. Having someone that claimed to be your friend and make it their mission to beat you down (not physically but emotionally/mentally). I think certain kinds of friends were drawn to me because I was someone who would take an emotional beating and not do anything about it. It took me years on years to get past this but eventually I cut them all out of my life like cutting the fat off of meat. All of those girls who bullied me (in disguise as friendship) haven’t had a place in my life in a very long time.

I think in some ways I am still a doormat for the kind of people that get a certain kind of pleasure in making others feel bad. Hell over the years I’ve been stalked (threatening to kill me) and harassed. It’s gotten so bad I’ve had to bring police in to deal with it. I don’t know what about it that draws these people to me but apparently I have nack for it.

I believe certain people need to bring others down to make themselves feel better.

I do not at all have the mind of a bully… in my mind bullies are intolerant of contrary opinion, domineering and rather cowardly. I would hope that none of those terms could be fairly used in describing me. – Conrad Black

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